Cotonou
Guide for dating in Cotonou helps you to meet the best girls. This dating guide gives you tips how to date Beninese women. You will learn rules where and how to flirt with local Beninois girls. We advise how to move from casual dating to the relationship and find the real love. We also tell the best dating sites in Cotonou. In this article below you will find more information where to meet and date girls in Cotonou, Benin.
Girls in Cotonou:
- Looks of girls: 3.5 / 5
- Attitude of girls: 4 / 5
- Loyalty of girls: 3 / 5
- Education level of girls: 3 / 5
Dating in Cotonou:
- Chance of arranging dates: 4 / 5
- Casual dating culture: 4 / 5
- Online dating popularity: 3.5 / 5
Sex in Cotonou:
- Women's sexual activity: 4 / 5
- One-night stands: 4 / 5
More about Cotonou:
- Nightlife in general: 3.5 / 5
- Locals' English level: 1.5 / 5
- Moving around the city: 3 / 5
- Budget per day: US$50- $500
- Accommodation: US$10 - $200
Contents
Dating
Somewhere on the Gulf of Guinea surrounded by Togo, Burkina Faso, Niger, Nigeria and the Atlantic Ocean is the country of Benin. With a population of about 12 million people over an area of 14,763 kilometers squared. The capital city of Benin is Porto Novo though the biggest city and the commercial and economic center is Cotonou. The city is located on the coast of the country and has a population of about 2.7 million people. It is home to most of the country's government buildings and diplomatic services.
Girls in Cotonou are very beautiful and outgoing. The girls like having a good time and provided you know where to take them; you will enjoy your time with them.
Dating Culture
The dating culture in the city of Cotonou is very vibrant. The women are always ready to mingle and socialize with the men especially foreigners. While some aspects of culture still remain, the city is embracing more and more of western culture. There exist many online dating platforms that connect the ladies to potential suitors. The entertainment joints in the city are also lively and you can be sure to find beautiful women in the city.
Sugar Dating
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Online Dating
Dating in Cotonou can be a bit tricky due to not knowing if you have a solid connection, so your best bet is to sign up for a dating site before you venture to the night club or bar, so you can meet a few locals ahead of time. AdultFriendFinder.com lets you meet local members in Cotonou and get to know them on a personal basis before you meet in person. Take advantage of site features like live chat and member to member webcams so you can begin flirting before arranging a face-to-face meeting.
Webcam Dating
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Women
The city of Cotonou has a population of almost 2.5 million people. As the biggest city in the country attracting people from all parts, it follows that there are many women in Cotonou that you can hook up with. The women in the city can be broadly categorized as follow.
We have students studying at numerous universities and colleges in the city. This young group of women is the liveliest and most active in the dating game. As most of them are tasting relative freedom for the first time having lived with their parents for long, they are always discovering the world around them. They will have moved out of their parents' homes and now live in hostels.
As the students graduate and start working in the city, they become young professionals. These are young women who are in their first jobs. They are slightly better off than the students and occasionally go out even if to catch up with friends. The girls here try to save by sharing a house with their friends from the college of relatives living in the city. It is at this stage that most young women get into relationships and get married.
After they have worked for a while, the women now become full professionals with many years of experience both at work and in life. As mentioned above, at this point, most women have already gotten married and are starting or already have children in their families.
Another type of woman found in the city is the women employed in the informal sector. Some end up here because they did not manage to further their education and so cannot get employment in the offices so they end up as sellers in the merchants or doing menial jobs in the city.
Beninese Girls (age 18 - 29)
These ages mark a very important stage in the life of the Beninese girls. At 19 years, the can officially call herself an adult this comes with the benefit of getting some freedom from the parents and the community. In terms of education, most people at this age move over from high through a short break into college or university and later on to employment. With the transition and respect come enhanced responsibilities.
This age marks the end of puberty, resulting in the formation of the body's sexual characteristics. What was before small lumps on the chest grow on to become soft succulent and round breasts. Beninese women are naturally endowed in this area and you will start seeing the ladies consciously making them visible. The bum and hips also expand significantly. The facial complexion also changes resulting in naturally beautiful faces.
The girls will start wearing tighter clothes that show off these features. Miniskirts and tight trousers will prominently display the newly developed lower abdomen and thighs. The natural beauty will be accompanied by the application of makeup and cosmetics.
These girls are very outgoing and free-spirited. The girls can be easy to hook up with as most of them are savoring the new freedom caused by moving out of their parents' homes. For the lucky ones, this is the age at which they get married.
Beninois Women (age 30 - 45)
This is the age at which most women get to settle down both in family and in their careers.
At this point, many women have chosen their partners and many have already been married with children. For the career ones, this brings in the task of maintaining a balance between career and family as the children may still be young and needing the attention of the parents.
The women here are less liberal in mannerisms as many are in marriages and so they have to carry themselves with more dignity. They will dress slightly more conservatively and expose less of their bodies. For those not yet married, dressing modestly in an attempt to make themselves appear presentable to potential suitors. The women will invest in cosmetics, makeup and other beauty products to enhance their beauty.
The married women will have moved in to stay with their parents while many unmarried ones nowadays move out and stay alone knowing that this is only a temporary stop on the way to the marital home.
These women are also easy to hook up with as the unmarried ones are on the lookout for potential suitors so they tend to be more ready to talk and listen to men
Beninese Ladies (age 45+)
These are the more mature women who have had plenty of experience in all areas of life. In the line of career, these women have grown in their career and many occupy leadership positions wherever they work. For those in business, by now, the business is now at cruising altitude and easily supplies the needs of the woman and her family. It is expected that by now, the woman will have married and most likely be having children who may be in their youth or late teenage. Unless one is separated, divorced or widowed, most women live with their husbands and their children.
The women will gradually change her dress code as she grows older and older shedding off the tighter clothes and getting more comfortable and loosely-fitting ones. This is partly out of self-respect as one would not want to be dressed in the same tight clothes as those worn by her daughters. This change is also due to the physical changes her body goes through as she grows older. However much we may try, there will always come a time when the body starts giving in to age and previously flawless skin starts developing wrinkles.
This does not mean that these women lose their appeal completely as they can easily afford beauty products that conceal some of the signs of aging. These women, though rare, can be good to hook up with. This is because maturity brings along the benefit of knowing what they want so they will not take a lot of time to decide.
Foreign Girls (tourists, expats, students, etc.)
With its beautiful beaches, Benin is a popular destination for tourists. The city of Cotonou receives many of these guests because as the biggest city, it is a port of call for many guests in the country. Cotonou’s beaches and other attractions also make the city a popular tourist destination. As the economic and commercial center of the country, many foreign organizations have their offices in the city thereby increasing the number of foreign girls in the streets of the city. The city also hosts more than ten universities, some campuses of international universities. This also sees many students flocking into the country to attend these institutions of learning.
Sex
As mentioned earlier, Benin girls are some of the easiest to hook up and have sex with. The girls here have been heavily influenced by western culture, especially the French who are known for their legendary romance. This, together with the local belief that all things foreign are god, greatly improve your chances of having sex with the local girls.
Sex Culture
In addition to the influence of foreigners in the country, Benin is one of the biggest consumers of movies from the Nigerian film industry, popularly known as Nollywood. These movies are increasing having sex themes in them which also has a great impact on how the locals view sex. While in many African countries sex is a rare topic of discussion even in marriage settings, the Beninese are not only ready to discuss it but to have it.
One-Night Stands
Another result of the western influence in Cotonou has been the increase in one-night stands. While many African girls would not be easily tempted to have sex with someone they just met, this phenomenon is becoming increasingly popular in the city. This has been greatly influenced by the presence of many foreigners in the country as well as the proliferation of online dating sites.
Best Places to Meet Single Girls
Although Cotonou is not the official capital of Benin, the city is by far bigger and busier than Porto Novo, the official capital. As a result of this, the city has many places that attract many young girls. You only need to be able to identify these places and you will be sure of coming across many young girls ready to mingle and have a good time with you. As you go about your stay in the city, you will realize that the main language spoken by the Beninese is French. This is a remnant of the country’s foreign colonialist, France. It will be helpful if you can get someone to help you translate the language or you can learn a few basic terms to help you get by easily.
It is also important to find out the cost of moving around and accessing some of the sites before setting out to visit them. While some may not charge a direct entry fee, you need to have an idea of the cost of items that you may purchase so that you budget appropriately. Some places like clubs will require you to buy drinks of a certain value instead of an entrance fee. It is also important to know the cost of transport to move around.
Bars, Pubs and Nightclubs
Cotonou may not have a lot to write home about in the entertainment scene, but some of the ones found here are recommendable if a bit expat-oriented. After all, the lion's share of drinking in Benin is done at local buvettes, which are outdoor bars where all you need for a good time are a few plastic tables and chairs, an oversized speaker, and a large beer: Beninoise, or for the hardy, a Guinness or Awooyo. Anyone seeking local color should ask around and wander over to the nearest rickety watering hole for the experience
- Djunta: On Friday, this club is usually packed when the inhouse band plays afrobeat, jazz and even old school rock-and-roll until the wee hours of the morning.
- La Maison Blanche: This is a sprawling, multistory complex that includes a nightclub and a rooftop lounge. The club is one of the more comfortable places to enjoy beers at affordable prices.
- Le Livingstone: This spot is the main spot for expats.
- Mad Lounge: Mad Lounge is a hookah bar popular with Cotonou's young revelers. The place has Trace Urban on at a good volume, but still feels relaxing - thanks to the airy, thatched-roof setup and comfortably plush furniture.
- Africa Sound City : This is probably Cotonou's foremost live music venue. It is not very big, but there is a good-sized, professional-looking stage in the back, and a bar stacked with cases of beer in the front. Has an eclectic roster of bookings.
- Code Bar: This has one of the trendiest spots in town for locals and visitors alike since the day it opened. It's not quite a club - its open-air layout and cabanas defy the norm here - but you'll find plenty of folks imbibing bottle service or cocktails and taking a turn on the dance floor to the blend of African and hip-hop beats.
- Yes Papa: Yes Papa is a local artists' collective that hosts weekend concerts, Thursday salsa, Friday reggae, Saturday jazz, though the program can vary depending on demand.
- Drink City: It is famous for its beer tap.
Shopping Malls
Some of the leading malls in Cotonou include:
- Centre Commercial Nakura
- Nossac
- Benin Market Communication
- Africaine des Assurances
- Showroom Euromarket Cotonou
- Novare Great North Mall
- Marché Fifadji
Outdoors
It has been mentioned that Cotonou is the largest city in Benin even though it is not the official capital of the country. However, the city is the main commercial center of the country and many government and corporate organizations have their headquarters there.
The Dantokpa market is the biggest in the city. In the market, merchants sell everything from spices to electronics, baskets to plastics bottles. There is a whole section that sells voodoo fetish for the many followers of the fetish. As Catholics form the single biggest religious group in the country, they have a unique Cathedral in the center of Cotonou.
The Artisanal Center is a market geared towards tourists and is the place to go to buy souvenirs and gifts for family and friends.
The Foundation Zinsou an awesome artistic space where you can enjoy amazing art from local and regional artists. There is a branch of the foundation in neighboring Ouidah as well.
A visit to Cotonou cannot be complete without a visit to the beach. Soaking up the sun at a local beach is one of the best things to do in Cotonou. The Eldorado Beach Club is located by the beach and offers many activities. It can be considered a one-stop place to relax and participate in sports such as swimming (beach and pool), horse riding, Beach Volley Ball, Tennis and more. It’s very relaxing and the amenities offered are quite updated and well kept.
L’Atelier is considered to be one of the most refined restaurants in town, with excellent French and fusion cuisine, and an ambiance that's as optimal for business lunches as it is for a romantic evening out.
Universities and Colleges
Cotonou, being the biggest city and the main commercial center in Benin hosts several universities.
Some of the universities and colleges found in the city include:
- EPS Universite la Cite
- ISM Adonai University Calavi
- Hill-City University (HCUB) Cotonou
- High School of Management and Technology
- ISCOM University
- West African Union University
- Escae Benin University
- IRGIB Africa University
- Poma International Business University
- Kings College Cotonou
Relationship
With its many beautiful girls, Cotonou is a nice place to fall in love. The girls in this city are beautiful and social and provided that you know the right way to approach them, you will not have a hard time getting into a relationship with one of them. As with many African countries, the Benin culture constitutes several different tribes. Each tribe is unique in its own way and so any two girls may not necessarily act the same way when you approach them some of the girls may come from ultra-traditional backgrounds and may have a very conservative view of relationships. On the other hand, some girls, especially those from the urban areas and those with liberal upbringings may be easier to hook up with based on how they have been cultured.
As pointed out above, the city of Cotonou is full of attractions that can help you to impress your girl. For a relationship to thrive and be enjoyable, the two of you will need to have time away from everything else and go where you can be alone. Additionally, you also need to get interests that are shared between the two of you. These will continually add fun to your relationship as well as create a relaxed environment for the two of you to bond. Most girls here get into a relationship hoping that one day, things will escalate leading to marriage. You should, therefore, ensure that you do not take time before you move things to the next level, that is if you are planning for marriage.
Holiday Romance
Holidays provide a perfect opportunity to get into a relationship. This is because, unlike the normal days, you have a lot of time on your hands to build the romance. Our normal days are characterized by competition for our attention between work, family, friends, school and so many other things. However, as you enjoy your holiday in the beautiful city of Cotonou, you will not be distracted by any of those things. The relaxed mood that accompanies the holidays also works in your favor as everyone tends to let down their guard and look for a good time.
As you get into the holiday mood, you need to plan early and save so that you do not overspend. Spending the holiday with a girl will always present opportunities to be extravagant as you try to impress. While going to fancy restaurants and spoiling her with money and expensive gifts may get her to pay attention to you, you may end up overburdening yourself. This is also not the best way to hook up with a girl as it will not reveal the true nature of the girl and how she will treat you when you do not have money.
Tips for Successful Relationship
Getting a girl to like you and even starting a relationship can be a daunting task for many people. As hard as that is, sustaining a relationship is more engaging. This is because a lot more work goes into maintaining a relationship and making it successful.
The two basic elements in any relationship are the two of you. It then follows that you should take care that you get the right partner for you. Much on choosing the right partner is discussed later. However, it is a proven fact that most men are attracted first by the physical appearance of a girl more than anything else. This is because men are largely visual are what they see first is what impresses them. While beauty is good, you should ensure that there is more you like about the girl other than the physical. This will ensure that even if the beauty fades your attraction to her remains intact.
One of the biggest banes in a relationship is when there are unmet or unrealistic expectations. Although it is good for the two of you to have expectations of each other and what you expect from a relationship, these should be within the limits of reason and practicability. Quite often, our worldview is influenced by what we see around us and our interaction with others. In the case of relationships, we may look at someone else's relationship and expect our own to be the same. This may also be informed by what we'll see on media. If these expectations are unmet, we are likely to become frustrated and develop a feeling of lack of fulfillment. A relationship should be approached with an open mind with the two of you making your own story as you go along.
In the real world, no one is perfect. Whether apparent or not, we all have our flaws. As you get into a relationship, it is of utmost importance to remember that neither of you is perfect. Holding your partner to high moral and ethical standards may seem good but it is only likely to lead to frustration and disappointment. We all have our witnesses and these will come out on how we interact with people and react to circumstances. Understanding that each of you can fall short at any time will help you to be forgiving as you know that you will also falter and need forgiveness.
Having accepted that the two of you will always falter, you need to learn and address an issue as it arises. In applying this, you need to be wise and discerning enough to know if addressing an issue immediately is the right thing. This is because some matters may be highly emotive. If one or both of you are too emotional, you should take time only enough to allow the situation to calm down before trying to address it This way, you will avoid aggravating an already charged situation. On the other hand, you should not delay too much in addressing a matter as over time things will only pile up and become irredeemable.
Another way to have a successful relationship is to maintain a healthy balance between principle and compromise. A relationship brings two people who have been brought up and cultured in entirely different ways. As a result of this, the two of you will always have divergent views on many things both major and trivial. This also calls for wisdom to know when to hold on to your viewpoint and when to compromise. Before taking a stand on anything, you should listen to each other as at times, the two of you may be presenting the same view but in different ways.
Love
Falling in love is one of the best feelings and occurrences in life. The city of Cotonou on the shores of the Atlantic Ocean presents an ideal setting for this to happen. With its mixture of girls from different parts of the country as well as tourists from different countries in the world, you have a wide variety of girls to choose from. The city is good because of the liberal view that most residents of the city hold in matters of relationships. Many girls look forward to falling in love especially with a tourist.
Your love experience will largely depend on the commitment that the two of you will put into it. Any love affair requires time, energy, and even presence to sustain it, and most of the effort falls onto the man especially if you are hitting on a local girl. This is because most girls in Benin are culture to believe that the man is the head of the family and leads in all fronts.
How to Make Sure She Is the One
There are many different ways to know if a girl is into you but the length of your relationship is going to be the determining factor. First of all, it’s possible that you’ve just met a woman that you like and you would like to know if she feels the same way. The other possibility is that you have known each other for years and you would like to know whether or not she’s still in love with you. Even though sometimes the relationship is not very clear, some telltale signs can help you feel more reassured. When you become aware of them, it becomes easier to maintain your self-control and not give in to panic or fear of losing her.
One of the most prominent signs that a girl is for you is that she will be ready to compromise her comfort for you. In a relationship, it is not always that the two of you will always agree on everything. Once in a while, you will find each other on opposing sides of a matter with each one wanting their view to prevail. A girl worth your affection will seek to understand your perspective of things before deciding whether to oppose or compromise. She will also be ready to let herself lose if only just to maintain the peace in the relationship.
A good girl will always be ready to support you. No matter how accomplished or successful you may be, there will always be a time when you will need a shoulder to lean on. This can be either when you are going through a rough patch or even when you are about to venture into a new experience. You should pursue a woman who is supportive and caring and who encourages you to improve yourself and keep growing as a person. Whether it is financially, morally or even physically, a good woman will always be your first supporter as she knows that your success as a person is your success as a couple.
One of the best ways to judge the character and attitude of a girl you are pursuing is to see how she interacts with her family and siblings. A girl may put on her best behavior when with you in an attempt to impress you. While this is good, her true nature will always come out when she is dealing with her immediate family. In most cases, a person spends their early life with these people and from their familiarity; she will be always at her natural behavior. If she is always smiling and courteous with you yet abusive and rude to her parents or relatives, chances are high that with time, you will receive similar treatment. If she is polite to them, then you can look forward t her being comfortable with you.
This behavior is not only going to be apparent with her family but also with total strangers around her. You can observe how she treats a waiter in a restaurant or even a beggar on the street to know her better. Her kindness and courtesy towards you should be extended to everyone around her, or else she is just putting on a pretense for you.
Each person has their weaknesses and flows just the same way we all have our strengths. A person that you should consider holding onto for the rest of your life is someone who accepts your weaknesses and flaws. She understands that not all humans are created equal and that nobody’s perfect. She also realizes that imperfection can be turned into something awesome and great, and she loves you for who you are.
When she is in love, another indicator comes in the form of the time that she decides to spend with you and how much she invests in the relationship. Women generally do not spend their time and energy on a man for whom they do not feel anything. If a woman is willing to spend her time with you, especially when she would be doing something else, chances are high that that woman is in love with you. One of the biggest signs a girl loves you is when she accepts all of your invitations to spend time together, even if it is for simple things.
Even as you consider all these positive traits, you should appreciate that love is a mutual commitment meaning that even as you expect all these from the girl, you should be willing to give the same or even more. It would be unfair, for example, if the girl is willing to sacrifice her comfort to support you yet you are willing to do the same for her.
Marriage
Benin’s law puts the minimum age at which one can get married at 18 years for both boys and girls. However, one can marry early under special circumstances allowed by the law. Unlike most African countries, same-sex marriages are allowed in Benin. One can opt to do a traditional, civil or religious marriage ceremony. Most couples do variations of all three.
For a marriage to be registered, the law states that each of the future spouses must provide personally to the civil registrar competent to proceed with the celebration of the marriage:
- A copy of his or her birth certificate dating from less than 3 months issued for the marriage
- A copy of the acts granting exemptions in the cases provided for by law
- A medical certificate attesting that the premarital examinations have been carried out by the future spouses and the results have been communicated to
- A valid passport if any of the partners is a foreigner
The future spouses present themselves personally before the civil registrar on the day chosen by them and at the time determined by the registrar; each spouse is assisted by a major witness, whether parent or not.
However, where the personal appearance of either of the prospective spouses is not possible, the marriage may be celebrated by proxy; in this case, the future spouse who cannot appear personally can be represented by an agent.
Just like other African countries, Benin is made up of many tribes. Each of these tribes has its practices concerning many areas of life including marriage. Even with the different tribes, the process leading to marriage is almost similar.
Once a man has identified a girl that he would like to marry, he will visit the home of the girl’s parents for an initial visit. During this visit, he may go alone or accompanied by a friend or two. Many Beninese men opt to go alone as a sign of courage. As a sign of generosity, he will carry a small gift or shopping for the family. During this visit, the girl formally introduces the man to her family. The man and the father of the girl will agree on the date when the formal introduction of the family will take place.
Wedding
Family is considered a very important part of life in Benin. It is believed that family is the block that determines how society will turn out to be. Weddings are considered to be the start of this important institution and so a lot of time and energy is expended on this.
Once the church service is over, the guests are ushered to the reception grounds where there will be food and drink in plenty. In the meantime, the couple will proceed to a preplanned location to take photos accompanied by their bridal team. Couples invest heavily in wedding photography paying handsomely for this service. The couple then goes to the reception venue to join their guests in the celebration that goes on late into the evening.
In parts of Benin especially among the Yoruba, after exchanging vows, the newlyweds eat four different food items of a variety of flavors to symbolize the different emotions and moments in marriage. First is sour, typically a lemon slice, representing the disappointments a couple must face together throughout life. Next, a small sip of vinegar is served, for the bitterness that people have to overcome in fights and trying times. Then there is the hot element, often cayenne, as a way of bringing spice and passion into a relationship. A sweet spoonful of honey is the final element of the ceremony as a symbol of joy.
During the reception, there will be speeches and presentation of gifts with the highlight being the cutting of the cake by the couple.
On this second visit, the man will be accompanied by close family members. It is in this visit that negotiations for the bride-price will take place and the date for the traditional wedding. The traditional wedding can take place at the girl's parents at the home of her home or father's eldest brother. The bride price can be in the form of cash together with gifts and kola nut and traditional brew. Once the items are received by the family, the two are considered to be married according to the traditions. Although the couple can pick their registration certificate and start life officially as a married couple, many opt to plan for a church wedding to include friends in their celebrations.
Family Life
As mentioned earlier, the family occupies a very important part of life in Benin. From an early age, children are expected to be obedient and to show respect for their elders. Children learn gender-appropriate tasks early, especially girls. Most children have few toys and amuse themselves with simple games. The average household contains six persons, but extended families and polygamous households may be much larger. Often close relatives live in the same vicinity in separate households but function as a cooperative economic unit.
See Also
- North America | Los Angeles | New York City | Toronto | Cancun | Miami
- Caribbean | Barbados | Santo Domingo | Havana | The Bahamas | Saint Lucia
- Central America | Panama City | San José | Belize | Guatemala | Nicaragua