Guide for dating in Nigeria helps you to meet the best girls. This dating guide gives you tips how to date Nigerian women. You will learn rules where and how to flirt with local Nigerian girls. We advise how to move from casual dating to the relationship and find the real love. We also tell the best dating sites in Nigeria. In this article below you will find more information where to meet and date girls in Nigeria, Africa.
Girls in Nigeria:
- Looks of girls: 3.5 / 5
- Attitude of girls: 3 / 5
- Loyalty of girls: 3 / 5
- Education level of girls: 3.5 / 5
Dating in Nigeria:
- Chance of arranging dates: 3 / 5
- Casual dating culture: 2.5 / 5
- Online dating popularity: 3 / 5
Sex in Nigeria:
- Women's sexual activity: 3 / 5
- One-night stands: 3 / 5
More about Nigeria:
- Nightlife in general: 4 / 5
- Locals' English level: 3.5 / 5
- Budget per day: US$100 - $300
- Accommodation: US$30 - $150
- 1 Dating
- 2 Women
- 3 Sex
- 4 Best Places to Meet Single Girls
- 5 Relationship
- 6 Love
- 7 Marriage
- 8 Regions
- 9 Cities
- 10 See Also
The Federal Republic of Nigeria is a sovereign country located in West Africa bordering Niger in the north, Chad in the northeast, Cameroon in the east, and Benin in the west. Its southern coast is on the Gulf of Guinea in the Atlantic Ocean. Nigeria is a federal republic comprising 36 states and the Federal Capital Territory, where the capital, Abuja, is located. A multinational state, Nigeria is inhabited by more than 250 ethnic groups with over 500 distinct languages all identifying with a wide variety of cultures. The official language of Nigeria is English, chosen to facilitate linguistic unity at the national level. Nigeria is the most populous country in Africa and the seventh most populous country in the world, with an estimated 206 million inhabitants as of late 2019.
Dating Nigerian girls is fun. Nigerian girls are very outgoing and social. Nigerian girls are generally submissive and always prefer strong and confident men over those who show signs of weakness. Nigerian girls prefer going out with serious men and getting into relationships that eventually lead to marriage. During the first date, she will be on the look for signs of a commitment from the man. If she sees it to look like a casual date, chances are high that she will not show up again.
One of the common aspects of dating in Nigeria is that the ladies expect you to be the sole provider during dating. It is therefore wise to ensure that before you get into a relationship you can finance the nights out and the processes leading to the wedding. However, the proliferation of western culture and women getting empowered economically has seen some women being comfortable with chipping in once in a while.
Dating in Nigeria can be a bit tricky due to not knowing if you have a solid connection, so your best bet is to sign up for a dating site before you venture to the night club or bar, so you can meet a few locals ahead of time. AdultFriendFinder.com lets you meet local members in Nigeria and get to know them on a personal basis before you meet in person. Take advantage of site features like live chat and member to member webcams so you can begin flirting before arranging a face-to-face meeting.
While Nigerian girls can be categorized using different criteria such as age, tribe, occupation or even level of education, these women can be grouped on how they behave.
The first group is made up of girls who have been in a bad relationship in the past and are unwilling to commit themselves to another relationship. While some will claim that they will never fall in love again, all they need is the right way to approach them and a lot of patience. The risk of such women is that they come with insecurities from their relationships and so any slight feeling of being taken advantage of will have them getting mad and even overreacting.
The third type is the girl who is always getting into relationships. This lady believes that she must be in a relationship. She has been in several relationships as she keeps getting disappointed but without picking any lesson jumps right back into another relationship. This cycle ends up affecting her self-esteem as she may start to think that she is the one with a problem. While she has been hurt enough times to make her unwilling to commit again, she is afraid of being single and will always look forward to getting someone else.
With the effects of modernity creeping in, another type of Nigerian girl that you will find is the one who is addicted to her career. This is the lady who worked hard in school, passed and joined the university to study her dream career. After getting a job, this girl enrolled back to pursue higher education. As a result of this, she does not have time to socialize as her life involves commitment at work with meeting in between after which she has to go to an evening class.
Another type of woman that you will find in Nigeria is the devout religious one. With just a small fraction professing traditional religions, most of Nigeria is made up of Muslims and Christians. Particularly prevalent with the Muslims, the religious type stays away from getting involved with men unless they are ready for marriage. This makes these ladies even harder to get even harder than career women.
Nigerian Girls (age 18 - 29)
Nigeria’s great population directly means that Nigeria has one of the biggest numbers of young girls and women. Like many other countries, 18 years is the recognized age of consent. However, this age is not legally proscribed but it is a matter of common practice. Nigerian women aged 19 to 29 years are at the stage of transition between teenage and adulthood. These women are out of elementary school and for those who qualify, this is the time that they join the university. For others, this is the time when they make alternative career decisions such as getting in non-skilled jobs or joining the disciplined force.
Because of the strong religious upbringing for most Nigerian girls, most of them will only get into a relationship if they are sure that it will lead to marriage. For the Muslims, their religion forbids young girls frolicking with men unless they are married to them or are planning to get married to them. Christian teachings, especially the emergent charismatic churches, also frown upon such behavior. This, coupled with the strict upbringing that parents applying to the girls has greatly reduced the interactions.
At this stage, the girls are not yet financially stable as they are just getting into employment while some are still in college. For those still in college, some still depend on their parents for upkeep while others receive sponsorship from the Nigerian Students Loans Board. This means that as you take them out for a date, you should be able to cater for both of you.
Most Nigerian girls are known to be very well-endowed. The girls have some of the biggest bums in the world. While they dress relatively modestly, their bums and breast are prominent features in their bodies. For the liberal ones, they dress in knee-length skirt suits or dresses whereas some wear long tight pants. One common mode of dressing for Nigerian ladies is low-cut blouses which expose their cleavage. This brings out their voluptuous breasts.
Nigerian Women (age 30 - 45)
This is what can be considered to be the prime age as the women are not at their peak in all aspects of growth. By now, their bodies are fully developed although some may still be experiencing growth in their erogenous areas.
Because these women are more financially stable, they can purchase pricier hence better clothes than when they were young. Those who are still single or the liberal ones will still be inclined to put on tight clothes that enhance their features. The married ones dress more conservatively. These women are also able to purchase better fashion accessories, jewelry and beauty products which they put both at work and when they go out.
Those who had not married earlier get married and settle down in their families. As they do so, they strive to maintain a balance between the family and their careers and social lives. Many people lose friends at this time as they are unable to find time to catch up as was the case earlier in life. It is also at this time that many women make choices in their careers before settling down to pursue what they want and this will affect how they spend their time.
Apart from the married ones, women at this age are easy to hook up with. This is because of the urge to settle down which makes them more outgoing and receptive to approaches by men. Hooking up with these women is easy and good as they are generally more mature than their younger peers and so they have an understanding of what a relationship entails.
Nigerian Ladies (age 45+)
As mentioned earlier, 30 years is the official marriage age for Nigerian women. A woman who gets past this age without any visible signs of settling down with a man is often thought to be having a problem. This only gets worse when one is gainfully employed and seems stable. If one is still staying with their families, she may even be subtly pushed out as the parents will not want to appear to be encouraging her to remain single. In Nigeria, whatever achievement a girl has in life, she will be considered as a non-entity if she is part prime age and is not married. It is common for one to be shunned by one's friends and relatives. As soon as you get married, your status changes and you will even begin receiving invitations to communal gatherings.
Because of this pressure, most women of this age are married usually or will get married before getting to 45. Upon getting married, some women get pregnant immediately and get down to taking care of their babies. Some, however, get married and opt to continue building their careers before getting to motherhood. Despite this, some Nigerian women will withstand the pressure and remain single concentrating on their careers. A few opt to get pregnant by sperm donors and remain single even as they become mothers.
As the women grow older, they tend to change their dress code and cover up more. This means that the amount of skin they expose is greatly reduced. For the women in formal employment, the length of the dresses and skirts increases downwards while the trouser pants become looser. The neckline also moves up as they now become mothers. This does not mean that they become less attentive to their appearance, rather they move from risqué to classy. The women in this age bracket can finance their lifestyle and so they dress and accessorize more expensively.
Foreign Girls (tourists, expats, students, etc.)
In addition to the great number of local girls in the country, Nigeria also hosts many foreign girls. Every year, at least 5 million tourists visit Nigeria. Tourism in Nigeria centers largely on events, due to the country's ample amount of ethnic groups, but also includes rain forests, savannah, waterfalls, and other natural attractions. As one of the most developed countries in Africa, some of the foreign girls in Nigeria are students from neighboring countries who come to the country's universities. Nigeria also hosts many expatriates who come to work in the numerous local and international organizations.
It has already been mentioned that religion plays a central life in the lives of many Nigerians. Both Christianity and Islam are against engaging in premarital sex. This has resulted in fewer girls engaging in sex before marriage. This has however changed recently with the proliferation of western culture into the lives of Nigerians. This has opened up more Nigerian girls to casual sex. While parents and other guardians may have control over girls while they are still growing up and living under their roofs, they lose this as soon as the girls finish secondary school and go away to universities and colleges.
With three sets of laws governing life in Nigeria, the sex culture in Nigeria is relatively vibrant. Islamic law (Sharia), customary laws and civil law often contradict each other and this leaves gaps that are exploited by the young Nigerians to engage in sex.
Many young Nigerians are hooking up and having sex only to go their separate ways in the morning. This has been also greatly influenced by the great number of foreigners who come into the country for different reasons. These foreign women are seldom looking for long term relationships but will be content with one-night stands.
Best Places to Meet Single Girls
Nigeria is a pulsating powerhouse: as the most populous nation on the continent – nearly every fifth African is Nigerian – it dominates the region. Recently, though, the boom has shown a few signs of bust: the economy has been hit by the drop in crude oil prices. But Lagos, the main city, is resurgent: with burgeoning tech industries, posh restaurants and clubs, and an exploding arts scene, this megacity is the face of modern Africa.
Outside Lagos, you may feel as if you’re a lone explorer getting a glimpse of the raw edges of the world, immersing yourself in deep and layered cultures. From Yoruba shrines to the slave ports, from the ancient Muslim cities of the north (currently out of bounds for security reasons) to the river deltas, and among stunning natural environments – there are plenty of wonderful antidotes to a sometimes exhausting journey.
Bars, Pubs and Nightclubs
Nigerians love music and they love a good party. Much of the nightlife and entertainment in the country is to be found in Lagos and along the coast on the south of the country:
• Nimbus: Part of Bogobiri House in Lagos, this is a lovely place for a drink (and eat) – mellow in the day and happening at night. There's an attached art gallery with works from local artists, and at weekends there's live music. At the open mic night on a Thursday, you'll hear some astonishing young musicians.
• Elegushi Beach: Dancing bumper-to-bumper, bottles of the hard stuff – the party does not get better than Elegushi Beach on a Sunday night. Go with a local; there have been robberies. Not for the faint of heart. During the day, you can pay a fee to enjoy the semi-private beach.
• Escape Night Club: The club is among the best place to be if you want to party with top Nigerian celebrities and it is also an ideal place for networking. Besides, it is among one of the fast-rising nightlife spots in the Lagos and the environment is catchy and safe. Escape Night Club is beautifully decorated and it's one of the most visited hangout places for top Nigerian celebrities be it weekend or events that are most talked about if you looking for where to get a hold of your favorite celebrities and have a chilled weekend Escape is the place to have it all.
• The Bank: The Bank Abuja is a high profile, luxury, executive lounge in Abuja. Come and experience art lovers, fashionistas and other intellectuals at this grand lounge that offers you the best when it comes to socializing and expanding your network. The lounge is well lit, spacious and well decorated. The sitting arrangement allows for your privacy and allows you to show off if you want to. There is an upstairs sitting arrangement that speaks class and is reserved for VIP members.
• Baytown Lounge: Baytown Lounge is a garden-style lounge located in Gudu, Abuja. The lounge serves delicious grilled fish and chicken, along with your snail, nkwobi, serving up continental and local dishes. The party never stops at Baytown Lounge. At Baytown Lounge, the week kicks off with the karaoke night on Monday, in-house DJ entertainment on Tuesday, ladies' night on Wednesday. On Sunday the Baytown Live Band treats you to a live musical performance.
• The Place: The Place in Victoria Island, Lagos is a restaurant, bar, and entertainment hub. The entertainment hub comes with a pool table, football table and a wide variety of video games. The Place is popular amongst residents of Lagos because of their asun (roasted spicy goat meat) and other mouthwatering dishes such as prawn rice, spaghetti, yam and fried egg, chicken sauce and Chinese prawn and dice. The bar/ lounge comes alive at night as one of the major night club scenes on Fridays and Saturdays.
• The Filmhouse: The Filmhouse is a cinema in Surulere, Lagos. It is located at the Leisure Mall, (right beside Adeniran Ogunsanya Mall). The Filmhouse is popular for having the latest Nollywood Blockbusters as they are released. Movie premieres are also done at the Filmhouse where you can find yourself watching a movie with a Nollywood star. The sitting arrangement at the Filmhouse Cinema is spacious and comfortable.
• Aqua Nightclub: Aqua Night Club is based in Abuja and it is one of its kind. The club caters to 4 distinct areas that seamlessly blend into an electric atmosphere. Aqua Night club caters to the intimate, inconspicuous, discreet and all night dancers alike. The royally stocked bar and its island design enhances service and accessibility. Distinct decors grace the VIP rooms for the more discerning guests. It is everything you want from a nightclub.
• Cova Lounge: This is a beautifully decorated rooftop with white flowing curtains, high ceilings and a spacious terrace overlooking a section of Victoria Island. Music at COVA Lounge is awesome, and the various DJs each night are very good. You can expect the crowd to be alive and having a good time. There is a restaurant downstairs, so you can have a complete night out. Go from dinner to drinks to dance with ease. On Sundays, you can relax with a live band or you can if you fancy be the singer performing your favorite songs with karaoke or have fun at the grilling event.
• Shaunz Karaoke Bar & Lounge: This is one of the top destinations in Lagos for karaoke, live band, events and dance club. They offer a venue to relax and have fun with friends after work. You can participate in the karaoke session or just watch or catch your fun on the pool table while the ladies do their thing. Located inside Murphis Plaza, Shaunz Karaoke bar and Lounge is well equipped for a fun Karaoke night with quality speakers to TV screens all around down to a touch screen for your song inputs.
Some of the malls in Nigeria include:
• Port Harcourt Mall. Port Harcourt
• Ikeja City Mall, Lagos
• Silverbird Galleria, Lagos
• The City Mall, Lagos
• Festival Mall, Lagos
• Ado Bayero Mall, Kano
• Park Place Mall, Lagos
• Calabar Mall. Calabar
• Centro Lekki Mall, Lagos
• Palms Shopping Mall, Sango-Ota
As one of the largest countries in the continent both in terms of population and land area, Nigeria offers many natural and man-made features:
The Osun Sacred Grove is a large area of rainforest on the outskirts of Oshogbo. Within the forest is the beautiful Shrine of Oshuno, the River Goddess. In addition to natural beauty, there are many stunning sculptures by Suzanne Wenger (known locally as Aduni Olosa, the 'Adored One'), an Austrian painter and sculptor who came here in the 1950s. Alligators, snakes, monkeys and antelopes inhabit the grove, where there's a week-long festival here in August.
Nike Art Gallery: One of Nigeria's most important artists, Nike Okundaye, runs this enormous gallery in Lagos full of contemporary and traditional Nigerian arts. Nike herself is practically an incarnation of love and beauty, which is reflected in this astonishing four-story space. If you're lucky she'll be there and may grace you with a new Yoruba name. There's a small cafe on the grounds. Cultural tours to other Yoruba towns can be arranged through the gallery.
Kurmi Market: With thousands of stalls in a 16-hectare area, Kurmi Market in Kano is one of the largest markets in Africa and is the city's main attraction. It's a center for African crafts, including gold, bronze and silverwork, and all types of fabric.
The founding site of Abeokuta, famed Olumo Rock has a rich history and great spiritual significance. Hire a guide and climb the rock – at one point it is smooth and quite steep, so go via the steps if you're not confident. You will see shrines, sacred trees, tribal war-time hideouts, and ultimately, at the top, an astonishing view of the city. There's a historic hideout under a rock used by people fleeing tribal wars and slave hunters. At the summit, look down on the corrugated iron roofs of the town; you'll see St Peter's Baptist church – built in the 1840s, it's the oldest church in Nigeria – and a brown building housing a mosque which dates back to 1925.
Nigeria's largest national park, Gashaka-Gumti is also the remotest and least-explored part of the country. Its 6700-sq-km area contains rolling hills, savannah, montane forest – as wild and spectacular a corner of Africa as you could wish for. It also holds incredible diversity and is one of West Africa's most important primate habitats, as well as supporting lions, elephants, hippos and buffaloes. The park is open year-round, although access is easiest during the dry season (December to March).
Le-Ife is considered the birthplace of Yoruba civilization, where people still worship traditional deities at revered spiritual sites. At the 18th-century Oòni's Palace one of the king's servants will, for a fee, show you the shrine within the palace walls, take you to see Oduduwa's staff, and teach you fantastic Yoruba creation stories including the tale of Moremi the warrior-princess. There's a festival every single day of the year here except one, on a day determined annually by the king.
Yankari National Park is Nigeria's best park for observing wildlife. With a bit of luck you may come across buffaloes, waterbucks, bushbucks, hyenas, leopards, plenty of baboons and the odd lion. While the park's animal population has suffered from poaching it still has some big draw cards, like the 500-strong population of elephants, and the bird-watching is excellent.
The excellent Afi Mountain Drill Ranch near Cross River National Park in Calabar is one of Nigeria's highlights, with a rainforest canopy walk, close primate encounters and superb accommodation. Its headquarters is in Calabar.
Universities and Colleges
Some of the universities and colleges found in the country include:
• University of Lagos, Nigeria
• University of Ibadan, Ibadan
• Ahmadu Bello University, Zaria
• Auchi Polytechnic, Auchi
• Federal Polytechnic, Nekede Owerri
• Osun State University, Osogbo
• Federal University of Agriculture, Makurdi
• Adeyemi College of Education, Ondo
• University of Benin, Benin City
• Kinsey College of Education, Ilorin
A multinational state, Nigeria is inhabited by more than 250 ethnic groups with over 500 distinct languages all identifying with a wide variety of cultures. There are six main ethnic groups in the country, each from a different part of the country. Although the traditional relationship setups vary from one area to another, there are common traits in Nigerian relationships.
No matter how long you’ve been dating your partner, the relationship only becomes official after the formal introduction ceremony. On the other hand, this also means the couple is ready to tie the legendary knot. The introduction ceremony usually takes place in the bride-to-be’s family home. Her fiance’s people come to the house to pay their respects to her family and “state their intentions”. After the bride-to-be’s family accepts the official proposal, both families share food and drinks. These days though, introduction ceremonies are as good as one of the three wedding ceremonies that Nigerian couples usually conduct.
We work hard every year with the hope that we will be able to take time to relax and to explore life outside our work environment. This time comes in the form of the holidays. Whether it is during the festive season or other traditional holiday periods or we want to create our holiday moments, this is time that we all look forward. World-systems create a tedious repetitive cycle that guides our adult life. Once someone gets a job, their life becomes a routine of moving from home to work every weekday morning and getting back home every evening. The weekends are used to do any pending house chores and for some, do side hustle. This trend becomes stricter once children come along.
Naturally, we all look forward to getting away for the holidays. Holidays come with the added benefit because they offer the chance for one to hook up with beautiful girls. Spending the holidays in Nigeria is the perfect opportunity for you to hook up with local Nigerian girls or even foreign girls who are also on holiday. While many people get into holiday romance planning to hook up just for the duration of the holiday, some of these hookups blossom into long-term dates which in turn may result in marriage. The various interesting places mentioned above will give you enough distractions and spice up your holiday romance.
Tips for Successful Relationship
We all want to have healthy relationships, but most of us were never really taught about what that means. The key is being communicative and proactive.
As the months and years roll on, we tend to slink into our proverbial sweatpants and get lazy in our relationship. We lose our patience, gentleness, thoughtfulness, understanding, and the general effort we once made toward our mate. Think back to the first year of your relationship and write down all the things you used to do for your partner then start doing them again.
Over time, we assume that our partner knows us so well that we don't need to ask for what we want. What happens when we make this assumption? Expectations are set, and just as quickly, they get deflated. Those unmet expectations can leave us questioning the viability of our partnership and connection. Keep in mind that "asking for what you want" extends to everything from emotional to sexual wants.
Create a weekly ritual to check in with each other. This can be short or long, but it begins by asking each other what worked and didn't work about the previous week and what can be done to improve things this coming week. Additionally, use this opportunity to get on the same page with your schedules, plan a date night, and talk about what you would like to see happen in the coming days, weeks, and months in your relationship.
Unless you have committed to an asexual partnership, sex and touch such as kissing, holding hands, and cuddling are vital components of a romantic relationship. How much sex a couple has is, of course, up to the particular pair of individuals, so you must discuss your ideas about it to manage any desire discrepancy.
Life and work distractions can become paramount in our minds, and that leaves little time or energy for our partner. Barring any emergencies or deadlines, we should be fully present when we are with our mate. We truly hear what they are saying (instead of pretending to listen), we leave our distractions behind, and we don't pick them up again until the sun comes up and we walk out the door.
When conflicts inevitably come up, remember to approach them thoughtfully and with a lot of kindness toward your partner and yourself. If you see the stress beginning to escalate during a conversation about a conflict, one or both of you can call a break so that cooler heads can prevail.
In most disagreements, we communicate from the obvious emotions such as anger, annoyance, and the like. Leading from this place can create confusion and defensiveness, and it can ultimately distract from the real issue. Start communicating from the bottom layer which is the feelings that are driving your reactions, such as disappointment, rejection, loneliness, or disrespect.
Conversations quickly turn to arguments when we're invested in hearing our partner admit that we were right or when we are intent on changing their opinion. Choose to approach a conversation as an opportunity to understand your significant other's perspective as opposed to waiting for them to concede. From this perspective, you will have an interesting dialogue and prevent a blowout or lingering frustration.
It's well understood that apologizing is a good thing, but it only makes a real impact when you mean it. Saying things like "I'm sorry you feel that way," "I'm sorry you see it that way," or "I'm sorry if I upset you" are a waste of time and breath. Even if you don't agree that your action was wrong, you will never successfully argue a feeling.
Any issues you avoid, or truths you don’t want to acknowledge, will likely undermine your relationship. It’s better to face the truth squarely in the face right now and address it, rather than let it sabotage your relationship in the long run. Be intentional and figure out the truth about your relationship. Think through all aspects of it—your feelings and thoughts, the other person’s feelings and thoughts, as well as their external context.
Every human being is born with the ability to show love not only to the people one is born with such as family but with someone else whom we meet along the way. It is this ability that makes human beings start families as compared to other animals which mostly procreate without any feelings attached. A human being will sire another human and will continue to recognize and treat them as their child however old the child grows. This is in contrast to other animals that only bring their children up to the point where they can take care of themselves.
It is mysterious how we meet someone from an entirely different background or even nationality and our mutual feelings grow to a point where we always want to be with them. Apart from some cultures that allow relatives to marry one another, we will always get married to someone who was at one time a stranger. While two animals will meet and procreate and soon drift away, two human beings in love will continue to have those feelings towards each other for a long time even if they were to go their separate ways.
As mentioned earlier, Nigeria has more than 250 different ethnicities, each with its traditions and beliefs. Nigeria is also divided almost in half by two main religions; Islam and Christianity. All these divisions bring along different expressions of love in addition to the generic traditions that cut across the divisions. It is generally expected that the man will initiate the relationship though once the deal is sealed, both partners will work towards building it up. With the rise of social media, one of the best ways of showing love in Nigeria is by flaunting your relationship on social media. This includes putting up photos of the two of you and writing each other love messages.
How to Make Sure She Is the One
While everyone is looking for different traits in their life partners, there are some essential traits you should seek, from empathy to consistency. These traits help you both to understand and love each other.
A healthy, stable relationship focuses on giving rather than taking. Seeing your significant other happy should make you just as happy, and she should treat you in the same way. Your joy should be her joy, too—it can be as simple as asking about your day or looking after you when you are sick. As time passes, the excitement at the beginning of the relationship will pass, but you should both be just as focused on giving each other happiness.
If you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, you must find that person intellectually challenging. Looks are fleeting but personality is forever—your conversations together should be interesting, insightful and full of depth. Your partner should be able to challenge your opinions, opening up your mind to new ideas and concepts.
An ideal wife is someone who will do good things, not just because other men's wives do them too, but because they are the right things to do. She surpasses other women, not because she competes with them, but because she competes with herself and tries to improve every day a little bit more.
Before marrying a woman, you must be sure that she will always support you in any situation, especially in the presence of other people. If she is very considerate, then you won’t have to worry that she somehow will disgrace you. For example, a tactless woman may make a toxic comment to your relatives or may comment on your shortcomings in front of the guests. It doesn’t mean that she should always agree with you. She just has to know how to gently tell you about your problems.
There is a big difference between a wish and the ability to have children. If your girlfriend shows that she likes children and maybe even persuaded you to have a pet, then you know that her mother's instincts are active. For your children, this means that if you marry her, they will have a nice mother and a happy and healthy family. Look at her reaction when you start talking about children, she may feel afraid, but never disgusted.
In addition to supporting and encouraging you to pursue your own goals and dreams, she will have her own as well. A mature woman has a vision for her future and chases after it with voracity. A mature woman will be someone you can take on the world with. She will be your partner in crime, a teammate in your relationship, and life.
Nigerian law envisages 3 types of marriages;
• Traditional/Customary marriage;
• Church/Islamic marriage
• Statutory marriage.
Statutory marriage has become popular in recent times because the party seeking to dissolve the marriage must prove to the satisfaction of the Court that the marriage has broken down irretrievably. Moreover, in the case of the dissolution of marriage, the Matrimonial Causes Act provides for custody of the children of the marriage and settlement of the property.
Statutory marriage in Nigeria is a consequence of Nigeria's colonization. The Marriage Act and the Matrimonial Causes Act are modeled after the English law. However, despite the popularity of statutory marriage, Nigerians contract traditional/customary marriage first before contracting church or statutory marriage or both. Nigerian law even recognizes some churches as statutory places of worship. This means couples married in such churches are issued both a church marriage certificate and a statutory marriage certificate.
The process of conducting statutory marriages at most Marriage Registry envisages that a couple may have contracted traditional/customary or church/Islamic marriage before applying to contract statutory marriage. For instance, at the Marriage Registry, Abuja Municipal Area Council, Federal Capital Territory, the requirements for contracting a Statutory Marriage are as follows;
• 2 passport photograph from the parties;
• Filing of marriage notice for 21 working days;
• At the end of the 21 working days, the parties will bring a copy of their Birth Certificate or Declaration of Age;
• On the date fix for the wedding, the couple will bring a wedding ring. The wedding ring is optional.
• Each party will bring one witness for the signing of the Marriage Register;
If the parties are already married; they will bring;
• Church Marriage Certificate if the marriage was contracted in a Church.
• Court Affidavit if the marriage was contracted according to traditional law and custom
If one or both parties is previously divorced;
• Bring the order for dissolution of marriage from a competent court.
If one or both parties is a widow or widower;
• Bring a copy of the Death Certificate.
Upon the celebration of marriage, the parties must submit 3 photographs of their marriage photographs to the Marriage Registry. Different kinds of events make up traditional marriages in Nigeria, some hilarious and others interesting:
Wine carrying is a rite during an Igbo traditional marriage where the bride carries freshly tapped palm wine in a cup and looks for her husband in the crowd. When she finds him, she goes on her knees and presents the wine to him. On his part, he has to accept the drink because to reject it would be to reject his wife-to-be. After emptying the content of the cup, he puts some money in it.
Catching the bride is an interesting rite that takes place during a Hausa traditional wedding. It is organized so that the groom’s family can come and “catch” their beautiful bride. The man and his family are not allowed to see the bride until they have paid the required token. This is the final moment between the bride and her friends. This can be heartbreaking and that is why they ensure that the bride doesn’t go away too easily. During this time, the bride’s face is mostly veiled while her friends haggle with the groom and his family for a price to see the bride’s face.
In the Hausa culture, it is the representatives from the groom and bride’s family who exchange vows and not the bride and groom. They do this in the presence of an Imam and some wedding guests. They then go on to make prayers for the newly wedded couple and the celebration continues. Traditional marriages across Nigeria are quite interesting for many reasons. The food, the music, the outfits, and the rites all combine to make the day memorable.
This is a longstanding tradition in the Nigerian traditional marriage scene. The bride and groom dance on stage while family and friends spray money on them. The interesting thing here is that the couple has foot soldiers whose job is to collect every last penny in bags or baskets while pretending to dance.
Nigerian couples often have two weddings, with a cultural wedding followed by a religious ceremony that is often more western. These ceremonies are held days and sometimes weeks apart.
While some brides opt to wear a white wedding dress for their religious ceremony, couples are increasingly returning to their cultural roots and wearing stunning, bright outfits in their tribal colors, the colors of their soon-to-be spouse, or creating a mixture of the two.
Traditional Igbo wedding attire includes a lace blouse, a bright kaftan-like skirt, matching or contrasting coral beads and head tie. When brides wear their traditional attire, their makeup and accessories are equally as bright and bold. Couples who attempt a more western-style wedding ceremony will often ditch the white wedding gown after the ceremony and get glammed-up in their traditional dress for the reception.
When it comes to Nigerian weddings, everyone is invited, so trying to regulate the guest list is a headache Nigerian couples won’t have to endure. Wedding hosts simply prepare for the largest number of guests possible when it comes to catering, seating, food, and bonbonniere as an intended guest list of 250 could easily double or triple as the word gets out.
The couple will decide which colors and fabrics they would like their guests to wear on their wedding day and the respective families will go all out to create outfits that meet the requirements. This makes it easy to distinguish who belongs to each of the couple's families at a glance, and long-time friends who are not on the bridal party often choose to join in with the Aso-Ebi as well. It's common in Nigerian weddings for the bride and groom's extended family to wear the same color or fabric as the bridal party.
No matter how expensive or elegant your wedding outfit is, or how filthy the ground is, if you are a friend of the groom at a traditional Yoruba wedding, you will be required to lie prostrate (think planking but on solid ground) in front of the bride’s parents as a show of respect.
It is by no means a serious part of the Yoruba marriage tradition, but similar to the western tradition of carrying a bride over a threshold, a groom is expected to be able to carry his new bride to show that he has the strength to take care of her during their marriage.
A long-standing Nigerian wedding tradition is to spray money on the bride. This can be done at any time, although when the newlyweds step onto the dance floor is a popular moment. Money is usually thrown by older guests. The bridesmaids are tasked with collecting all of the thrown money. Money spraying is a gesture used in Nigerian culture to show your happiness for someone. It is done at baby showers, graduations, weddings, and even celebrations of death. It’s similar to showering your loved ones with blessings. Guests come to weddings with as little as $20 and as much as several thousand. Spraying is all dependent on what one is comfortable giving.
The bride's mother traditionally caters to Nigerian weddings with the assistance of extended family and friends. Food also plays a big role throughout the wedding ceremony, with both sides of the family giving one another trays of food and other gifts to symbolize their connection to one another.
Most households are composed of a mother, father and children, and many include grandparents, uncles, and aunts as well. Many houses are compound houses with people of different tribes and religions living there. This is more common among the less privileged families of Nigerian society.
In most cases the father has the primary responsibility for the care of the whole family in Nigeria. In some instances, working mothers in Nigeria supplement family income. Typically the mother cares for the children and the home while the father works outside the house. Decision-making authority is held by the father in Nigeria. In some less traditional households, mothers may have more authority when the father is not around. Women cook for the family in Nigeria. In some families, boys may cook occasionally. In most families in Nigeria, children eat separately from adults. The wealthy and even lower to middle-class families hire house help as labor is very inexpensive in Nigeria.
Culturally, most Nigerian cultural groups practice patrilineal descent, have patriarchal authority, have a patrilocal rule of residence, and are generally patricentric in outlook. The children are socialized with this arrangement in mind, and female children are consciously socialized to serve and be subordinate to males. This hierarchical structure has sometimes led to the dissolution of marriages on the grounds of the birth of only or mostly female children.
A unique feature of the Nigerian family is the existence of a loose matrilineage and the use of various terms to describe households and unions. For example, some households are headed by women. This may be the result of the women being widowed or divorced. The women might also be out-side wives. This term describes women who function as wives to married men who live with their original wives and have extra wives outside their homes.
These men are mobile husbands who move among their various partners, spending nights, having sex with their partners, and supporting them financially. These outside wives use the surname of their "husbands," and in many cases, are known to the man's original wife. Those who are not part of the culture may find this confusing, but the practitioners seem to manage well. The Nigerian legal system has improvised ways of accommodating such women and their children. In many cultures in Nigeria, there is no such status as an illegitimate child.