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Guide for dating in Xiamen helps you to meet the best girls. This dating guide gives you tips how to date Chinese women. You will learn rules where and how to flirt with local Chinese girls. We advise how to move from casual dating to the relationship and find the real love. We also tell the best dating sites in Xiamen. In this article below you will find more information where to meet and date girls in Xiamen, China.

A beautiful view of Xiamen

Girls in Xiamen:

  • Looks of girls: 3.5 / 5
  • Attitude of girls: 3 / 5
  • Loyalty of girls: 3 / 5
  • Education level of girls: 3.5 / 5

Dating in Xiamen:

  • Chance of arranging dates: 2.5 / 5
  • Casual dating culture: 3 / 5
  • Online dating popularity: 3.5 / 5

Sex in Xiamen:

  • Women's sexual activity: 3 / 5
  • One-night stands: 2.5 / 5

More about Xiamen:

  • Nightlife in general: 4 / 5
  • Locals' English level: 2 / 5
  • Moving around the city: 4 / 5
  • Budget per day: US$100 - $1000
  • Accommodation: US$50 - $500


The People’s Republic of China is a country in East Asia. China is distinct as the most populous country in the world with a population of more than 1.4 billion. The country covers 9.6 million square kilometers, making it the third-largest country in the world. China has the most number of neighbors with 14 countries sharing a border with China. Occupying nearly the entire East Asian landmass, it covers approximately 7% of the land area of the earth. The main language spoken is Standard Chinese while other dialects of Chinese exist in different regions.

Xiamen is a coastal city in Fujian Province in Southern China. It is divided into six districts: Huli, Siming, Jimei, Tong'an, Haicang, and Xiang'an. Altogether, these cover an area of 1,699.39 square kilometers with an approximate population of 4.5 million.

Although the Chinese are generally conservative, dating Chinese girls is quite enjoyable and gratifying. They are caring and loyal, meaning that if something will go wrong - they will take care of you. Many Chinese women prioritize the interests of family more than their interests. While she may be able to make her own decisions, her family will have some influence over her life.

Dating Culture

The ultimate goal of most relationships in China is marriage. Young Chinese adults are often under a lot of pressure from the elders in their family to find a good husband or wife and get married relatively early. This is a big part of why dating is often taken so seriously. Chinese young people often feel like they don’t have the time to “play the field” as it happens elsewhere. While every parent is different, Chinese parents expect to be more involved in their children’s relationships. It is not uncommon for parents and grandparents to set their children up on blind dates with suitable matches they’ve found.

Online Dating

Dating in Xiamen can be a bit tricky due to not knowing if you have a solid connection, so your best bet is to sign up for a dating site before you venture to the night club or bar, so you can meet a few locals ahead of time. AdultFriendFinder.com lets you meet local members in Xiamen and get to know them on a personal basis before you meet in person. Take advantage of site features like live chat and member to member webcams so you can begin flirting before arranging a face-to-face meeting.


The city of Xiamen is one of the main cities in Southern China. The city is composed of two main islands and a section on the mainland. With a total metropolitan population of about 4.5 million people, there are different types of women in the city.

One group of women in the city is students. As a major city in Southern China, the city has more than ten universities and several other institutions of higher learning. With the high education standards in the city coupled with strict discipline, these girls spend much of their time in school only coming out on weekends into the nightclubs and other entertainment spots. These young women dress less conservatively with some completely shedding off their traditional Chinese attire.

Another group in Xiamen is made up of women professionals. Whereas in the past many women rarely went beyond secondary school, the modern Chinese woman goes all the way to university, gets employed and some even get up to senior positions in organizations.

Chinese Girls (age 18 - 29)

This group consists of girls in colleges and universities as well as those in the early stages of their careers. For many years, Chinese girls rarely went beyond their secondary education. Many dropped off and became housewives. Following a push by the government, many girls are joining university and colleges and ending up pursuing careers before they get married. Dating and being in lasting relationships is rare in China as most couples are formed from longstanding family friendships or through arranged marriages.

Just like girls from other Asian countries, Chinese girls have relatively smaller physiques. The girls’ breasts and bum grow though they remain firm and rarely do they start sagging, especially the breasts. Despite their less conservative nature, Chinese girls are cultured to always dress decently especially in public. Most Chinese girls are married by their 30th birthday. This is usually to allow the women to continue focusing on their careers.

Before they get married, the Chinese girls remain in their parents’ homes and seldom move out to live alone even when they are financially stable.

Chinese Women (age 30 - 45)

The women in this age-group are settled in their careers and some of them occupy senior positions in their organizations. This means that they can afford more well-heeled lives and some of them even own various assets such as cars and houses. In addition to career, this stage marks the beginning of family life for most as they have young children with some getting into teenage life. This means that young women are faced with the task of establishing a balance in life between their growing careers, their young families and their social life.

While in the past most girls did not venture out to live alone, the modern woman treasures her privacy and independence and so, as soon as she can afford it, she will move out of their family home to stay alone. This ensures that no watches over her life and question her when they move in and out of their house or when they host someone.

Chinese Ladies (age 45+)

At this stage, most women are married with children and even grandchildren. At first, the bodies of these women are still in good shape with curves at the right places. However, as they grow older, the body begins losing its attractive shape and wrinkles start to appear. Initially, these blemishes are concealed by the expensive makeup and jewelry that the women can afford. This only lasts for a while as soon the women accept the grace of age.

Even as they grow older, these women can afford the best products and clothes that money can buy and so they continue to look good even though the age may be seen in their faces. Because of their age and for some, position in society, these women wear conservatively as they grow older. By now, the clothes are longer, looser and cover more skin. The amount of cosmetics they use on their face and body also reduces as they do not want to be seen to be doing what the younger generation is doing.

Having worked or even run their enterprise for a substantial amount of time, these women are better placed economically and can afford investments whether with their spouses or on their own. Still, as a result of this long-term engagement, those employed will have risen through the ranks in their places of work and some even occupy senior management positions.

Foreign Girls (tourists, expats, students, etc.)

Like many Chinese cities, Xiamen attracts many girls from all over the world.one major group of girls in the city are tourists. The city is one of the most visited in the country and many tourists include it in their itineraries. Another group of foreign girls in the city are students. With Xiamen having more than 15 universities, many girls especially from the neighboring countries and from other developing countries flock the city's institutions of learning.


In traditional Chinese culture, sex is only allowed between married couples. Sex before marriage is frowned upon. Women were careful to remain virgins until they got married. However, things are changing and many women view sex as a sign of growth in their relationships and as a way of showing their commitment to their partners.

Sex Culture

Sex is increasingly considered something personal and can now be differentiated from a traditional system that featured legalized marital sex and legal controls over childbirth. The reduction in controls on sexual behavior has initiated a freer atmosphere for expression. More and more people now regard sex as a basic human right that everyone has the right and freedom to pursue.

One-Night Stands

For a long time, the Chinese have been known for their conservativeness in many things including sex. The very thought of a person engaging in sex outside the confines of marriage was unheard of. This is rapidly changing and one-night stands are becoming a common occurrence. One of the most common places where one-night stands are initiated is the nightclubs in Xiamen. Mobile phones have also contributed to one-night stands by providing a convenient and private way of communication in panning for a one-night stand.

Best Places to Meet Single Girls

Xiamen and the surrounding countryside are famous for being an ancestral home to overseas Chinese. It became one of China's earliest Special Economic Zones in the 1980s. Xiamen was recently voted China's cleanest city and has many attractions for the tourist. Xiamen and its surrounding countryside provide spectacular scenery and pleasant tree-lined beaches. The most attractive place should be the Gulangyu Island.

Bars, Pubs and Nightclubs

Some of the most popular nightclubs in the city include:

  • La Bomba
  • Soul Bar
  • Baby Face
  • Xiamen Huanchang
  • Nana Pub
  • Fulian Entertainment Town
  • Ying Hao
  • Yuxin Yanyi
  • Xinshiguang Karaoke
  • Zui Tang

Shopping Malls

Some of the malls in Xiamen include:

  • SM Lifestyle Center
  • Xinda Duty-Free Shopping Mall
  • Aluohai Shopping Center
  • Xiamen Yeohwa Hotel Shopping Mall
  • Gulong Shopping Mall
  • Rainbow Shopping Mall
  • Pan Base Center
  • Robinson Shopping Mall
  • California Commercial Plaza
  • Fuwanbang Commercial Square


  • Nanputuo Temple: This Buddhist temple complex on the southern side of Xiamen is one of the most famous temples among the Fujianese, and is also considered a pilgrimage site by dedicated followers from Southeast Asia. The temple has been repeatedly destroyed and rebuilt. Its latest incarnation dates from the early 20th century, and today it’s an active and busy temple with chanting monks and worshippers lighting incense.
  • Húlǐ Shān Fortress: Across Daxue Lu, south of Xiamen University, is this gigantic German artillery post built in 1894. You can rent binoculars to peer over the water to the Taiwanese-occupied island of Kinmen formerly known as Quemoy and claimed by both mainland China and Taiwan.
  • Xiamen University : It is one of the most famous free attractions of Xiamen. It is one of the prettiest universities in China. The architecture is quite spectacular, combining Eastern and Western styles, as well as modern and traditional styles. It is described as "wearing a suit with a bamboo hat". The old trees and beautiful flowers make the university seem like a garden. There is a beautiful Lotus Lake on the campus, which is flanked by trees. If you visit at the right time, you will see all kinds of flowers in spring and red leaves in autumn.
  • Overseas Chinese Museum: Aside from acting as a refuge from the city, this is an ambitious celebration of China’s communities abroad, with dioramas, street scenes, photos, props and artifacts held in a three-story temple-like building. The ground floor stands out if you’re stuck for time.
  • Hakka Tulou Clusters: This has been inscribed by UNESCO as World Heritage Site. If you want to explore the Tulou in-depth instead of visiting like a tourist, this combo package is designed for you. Service is inclusive of hotel pickup in Xiamen, bus ticket to Hu Keng in Yong Ding county, and 1-night family inn accommodation in hundreds of years old Tulou. The night time and next day morning is the best for photos, walk into dozens of Tulou nearby to explore the traditional lifestyle that has not been changed for centuries.
  • Bailuzhou Park: It is a good place for leisure and games and is located in the downtown area. Tall palm trees line the lakeside. You can see egrets flying freely, walking on the ground, or standing by the lakes. There is a sculpture of the Egret Goddess. It is a good place to shoot photos. Visitors with children can feed the pigeons with bread in the square, fly kites on the lawn, or walk dogs. On holidays, when the fountains are on, you can enjoy the music show.

Universities and Colleges

Some of the universities and colleges found in the city include:

  • Xiamen University
  • Xiamen University of Technology
  • Jimei University
  • Huaqiao University
  • Xiamen Institute of Technology
  • Xiamen Huaxia University
  • Xiamen Far East Training Institute
  • Xiamen College of Science and Technology
  • Xiamen National Accounting Institute


Just like anywhere else in the world, dating in China is guided by a mixture of traditions and trends. Relationships in Xiamen are unique and different from relationships in other countries. In the traditional setup, parents influence the choice of relationships for their children as it was expected that the relationship would result in marriage. In most cases, financial ability and social status were the main considerations for parents. These are still applicable to an extent though the choice is now left to the couple. However, it is still the expectation of many young Chinese that the relationship they get into will result in marriage.

Many relationships in Xiamen grow out of friendships between families. Most Chinese get into relationships with people that they have known for a while. This is slowly changing as modernization is forcing people to move out of their home areas to settle elsewhere meaning that chances are higher for one to meet a new potential partner.

With the education system in the country being very rigorous, many young Chinese are unable to balance relationships and studies. As a result of this, many Chinese relationships begin after both partners are done with school.

Holiday Romance

The pristine beaches, historical setting and interesting culture make Xiamen one of the most visited cities in China. Every year, many tourists flock there coming from all over the world. With these great numbers, the city is one of the best places to have a romantic holiday. The best way to get in a holiday romance is by going into the vacation with an open mind. Holidays have a way of bringing out a different side of people. People who are normally uptight tend to open up during the holiday. Once you have decided to get into a holiday romance, you need to establish limits and know what you seek to achieve, whether it is just for the holiday or open to continue afterward.

Tips for Successful Relationship

We all long for the perfect relationship straight from a movie where love conquers all and the two of you live together happily ever after. While movies, may exaggerate the ideals of true love, it is possible to have a relationship that makes you smile every time your girl walks into a room. For this to happen, the two of you have to go out of your way and make the relationship work.

Many relations go through a rough patch when the two partners do not get what they want. More often than not, this happens when one does not know what the other person wants. However long we stay with someone or have known them, we should never assume that they know what we need or how we feel. To avoid the situation where your partner is unsure of what you want or why you are frowning, you should tell them if you need them to do something for you.

Biologically and emotionally, men and women are wired differently. Each sex has its generic traits that define them. While women are generally bound to open up on their emotions and feelings, men do not easily open up to others or show emotion. This however does not indicate a lack of emotion. As the two of you get into a relationship, you need to understand this and know how to treat each other's feelings.

Even as men and women are separated by their gender, any two people, even if they are of the same gender, are different. Coming from different backgrounds and having gone through different upbringings, the two of you will have differences in thought and how you react to external influences. The two of you must try as much as possible to learn about each other and also be tolerant of the shortcoming of each other.


To fall in love is a wonderful thing. To fall in love with the right person is even better. Xiamen offers you a chance to fall in love with the right woman. As mentioned, the women in the city are friendly and polite meaning that you will have a relatively easy time hooking up with them. These women are beautiful and open-minded and will allow you to get to learn about them and their culture. While dating these women is fun, you need to be aware of the cultural environment in the city so that you do not go wrong in your love affair.

How to Make Sure She Is the One

Even as we seek for the right lady to date, we all have our preferences in terms of who the right person for us is. Some of these qualities may be generic but some of them are unique to our taste.

You should find someone with whom you can sustain a conversation. However beautiful a girl can be, her looks will count very little once the two of you settle down together in your marital home. The two of you should be able to hold all manners of conversation together both serious stuff and humor.

A good woman will not only be kind and courteous to you but others around you. They say that how someone treats a waiter in a hotel brings out their real character. If she is kind to such people, she is the one.

In life, we all have personal ambitions that we seek. As the two of you come together, she should have realistic ambitions for her growth even as the two of you seek to grow together.

Even as we are busy in life developing ourselves, another way to know if she is the one for you is if she is willing to sacrifice time and effort to spend time with you. If she is continually busy with little or no time to spare now, she will not have time when you are married.


The legal minimum age for marriage in China is 22 years for men and 20 years for girls. As mentioned earlier, the Chinese traditionally married from known friends or even business partners' families. While some families are continuing with this tradition, most young couples are marrying hitherto unknown people. However, the parents and elder relatives still have some say about who one marries. Once a young Chinese their potential partner to the parents, they take time to learn about them before deciding whether they are the right person.

For women, the right person for them is one who is financially stable and if possible, has business and political connections.

In China, many weddings have a legal and social approach through civil registration and the traditional wedding ceremony.

To have a marriage registered, you need the following:

  • A current passport
  • Chinese residence permit
  • A health certificate from a local hospital designated by the marriage registration office
  • Three photos of the marrying couple, taken together
  • A registration fee
  • A certificate of marriageability (the marriage registration office needs a form from the foreign partner's home government stating he/she is not already married in his/her home country.)


During a formal Chinese wedding proposal, the groom’s family will present different gifts to announce the engagement, which is usually food and cakes. Both families send “Double Happiness Cakes” to their relatives and friends, along with invitations. The bride’s family provides a dowry list, and the groom’s family performs a “setting bridal bed” ritual.

The typical Chinese wedding invitation is red, placed in a red envelope, and usually has gold, vertical wording read from right to left with the groom’s information presented first before the bride’s. The invitation also usually includes the following – Chinese calendar dates for the wedding banquet, order of birth and names of the bride and groom, names of the parents, dinner venue, time for the cocktail reception, and time for dinner. The double happiness symbol is usually found somewhere on the invitation.

It is a Chinese tradition for the bride to wear a red dress, called a qipao and to cover her face with a red veil on the wedding day. In Chinese culture, red symbolizes happiness, prosperity and good luck. Today, modern weddings call for the bride to wear a white bridal gown, and third ball gown throughout the evening. Many modern brides also change into a fourth dress at the end of the ceremonies to send off their guests.

This is a very lavish and usually expensive affair. Guests will sign their names in a book or on a scroll to present their gifts. Once the dinner begins, the bride then changes into a traditional red Chinese wedding dress. In traditional Chinese culture, both sets of parents would have separate wedding feasts. Many foods are considered symbolic in Chinese culture, like the whole fish for abundance, and sweet lotus seeds for dessert, which symbolizes a wish for fertility. There are usually six courses during the banquet, and both the bride and groom change will clothing between the third and sixth courses.

Family Life

The family unit is considered to be one of the most central institutions. For many, their family provides them with a sense of identity and a strong network of support. In China, the family is largely understood through Confucian thought. In Confucian thinking, the family contains the most important relationships for individuals and forms the foundations of all social organizations. For instance, the roles of husband and wife, parent and child, elder brother and younger brother are clearly defined. A husband/father is expected to exhibit dominance and kindness to his wife in return for obedience and love, and offer guidance and protection to his children in return for respect and obedience.

Within the traditional household hierarchy, the patriarch and family provider was the father or eldest son. He was upheld as the ultimate decision-maker, though some families may have deferred to consulting their elders. Traditionally, the mother's role was to fulfill domestic duties and care for the children. The extended family also commonly lived with the immediate family. Nowadays, this household model is common only in very rural areas.

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